It’s no shock to anyone that university life has a reputation for having a big drinking culture. With a big focus on freshers' week, student club nights and flat parties, it is difficult to escape the aspect of drinking alcohol when starting university.
For lots of people, going to university and being able to get drunk multiple nights a week with great stories to tell is an exciting part of starting university, however for some of us this isn’t the case.
As someone who has lived in student accommodation having moved away from home, and also attends university in my home town now, the issue with not drinking is something I still struggle to explain to people. When moving away from university this was my biggest fear, I was terrified that I wouldn’t make friends and couldn’t join in with any social activities as I was so scared to tell people I didn’t want to drink alcohol. This was my biggest struggle, and although there are always societies and ways to make friends without drinking, the FOMO I felt was massive when not wanting to join in with drinking and evening activities.
Don’t get me wrong, I have met other people who don’t drink for a wide range of reasons, but for the most part, when I tell someone I don’t drink, I am nearly always met with a response of ‘but why’. To which my response is ‘I just don’t want to’ and yet this still doesn’t seem to be a sufficient enough answer for many people.
Of course, everybody is brought up differently, with different beliefs and lifestyles, but the responses I have received when stating I don’t want to drink are still not anywhere near what I believe they should be.
This was a major reason why I decided to move back home for uni, and it has helped a lot given I don’t have to live away from home, and don’t have the pressure of socialising every night because I’m away from home.
Some ways to tackle the ‘I don’t drink’ conversation at university that I have found to be the most useful have been:
1. Tell people you are on medication (even if you aren’t) mostly because if this is the reason you give, people don’t tend to ask many follow-up questions.
2. Get your own drinks, you could even pretend there’s alcohol in there even if there isn’t.
3. Tell them the truth, whether it’s religious reasons, personal preference or medical reasons. Although scary, there will be friends and people who will just support your decisions and not blink an eye.
4. Find societies and do activities that don’t involve drinking at all. Even if you want to avoid the social drinking evenings, attending sports clubs, writing/reading clubs, or going for coffee dates is a great way to keep socialising without having to have a conversation about not drinking.
There are no doubt endless ways you can avoid the not drinking conversation altogether, or an abundance of ways to make it easier, but ultimately the issue lies with the stigma there is around not wanting to drink at uni. When I first moved away to uni 4 years ago, I couldn’t find much online about how to navigate the experience when not wanting to drink. The more discussions that are had will only make these conversations easier, more common, and less scary for those who are in the same boat.
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